I’m lucky enough to be on holiday in Vancouver with one of my favourite people in the world, Nadine. We spent one of the days (thankfully a rainy one!) at the TEDx Stanley Park gathering to hear 15 wonderful people share their thoughts and give us some “ideas worth sharing”.
We’ve heard talks about the slavery in our food, how nature can help us get rid of bed bugs, how to live without regret…it was sometimes a little strange but overall pretty thought provoking!
I’m really grateful for this opportunity and have been thinking how to put the ideas that resonated with me into action with my life…but this is where I’m having a bit of a processing problem and it stems from a belief I’m developing:
I believe that we have different levels of existence and am not sure how I can bring them together to co-exist peacefully.
On some level, I think I am called to have a purely human experience. To not judge or strive or compare but to just experience this journey on earth from my viewpoint.
At the same time, I think I am called to connect with something bigger – to a wider experience/vibration/energy. The truth with this is that I have the potential to make an impact in this world – to support, to challenge, to leave the world a kinder, better place. So, it feels like I’m not just called to experience life, but to also live a life full of purpose and direction. I feel called to something bigger.
How does this desire for more co-exist with the reality that all I need to do in life is to explore this reality of being me?! Often I don’t know how to bring these two things together as it feels like they are polar opposites.
Does this make sense at all? I hope it does!
When sharing these thoughts with Nadine, sat on the beautiful Kitsilano Beach, I heard a little whisper in my mind say “you’ve got the action part sorted – you’re constantly doing, striving, planning, worrying about the doing, but you resist the being so often”.
In fact, if I’m honest with my self, I so often actively resist the being. I push down my feelings with food, I throw myself into action to avoid stillness, I follow the opinion of others to avoid listening to my internal voice of truth, I worry to avoid just being…so maybe I should forget about the bigger calling at the moment, because how will I hear it if I’m in constant action?
So, as I’ve explored before on this blog (when will I learn?!?!), I’m going to focus on just being and stop worrying about the higher calling.