I’m entering into my 33th year on this planet and wanted to spend a few moments to reflect on the past year, the lessons I’ve learnt and what I’m truly grateful for in my life.
Looking back through my photos, I’m overwhelmed at what an amazing year this has been and how lucky I am to have such richness in my life. The beautiful friends who support me and bring such laughter and light to my life. My family who are always there for me and accept me for exactly who I am. The opportunities I’ve had this year to travel, to explore this world, to grow in myself.
I’m truly lucky.
Now, before this starts turning into a puke-inducing love-fest for many of you, I’ll stop. But know that if you’re reading this, you have probably been part of making this year so special, be it in supporting my blog, by being a force of good in my life or for challenging me and supporting me to grow. Thank you.
This year has felt heavy in some ways – a year of super-duper exponential growth and here are some of the things I’ve learnt, dear friend:
I have a voice
Even if this voice is meant to only reach a handful of people on this blog or be shared with close friends, I have a voice. I have things to say and I’ve stepped into this voice a bit more this year by sharing more openly about myself, my struggles, my triumphs, my beliefs. I think we all have a voice and that it yearns to be expressed. So I will continue to do so.
With voice comes responsibility
I feel a little bit like Spiderman’s uncle when saying this –
“with great power comes great responsibility”
Nevertheless, I’ve seen it. Through cracking open and sharing my heart more with people, I’ve felt my heart growing and connecting more to others. From the homeless lady I saw yesterday, bought a cup of tea and shed tears for about how little she has when I have so much to the responsibility I feel for doing something about the destruction of the rainforest and the fight against climate change in the wake of Brexit and the US elections. Opening myself up, I am opened to see, to feel, to act and I feel this next year will be partly spent asking myself what this means in my life.
The year has been a year when I’ve stepped more into myself and the person I was born to be. I’ve partly shed the insecurities that have held me back and have dared to dream of the person I could become – a life coach, supporting others on their path towards greater courage, truth and love; a senior leader in an organisation making a difference in this world; a mother in the future (don’t get too excited mum!) either biologically or to a child who much needs a family to adopt them.
This ‘I am’ isn’t inward facing – I’ve started to see how interconnected we all are and how, whilst our bodies are separate, our consciousness/spirit/soul (whatever you want to call it!) is not as clear cut and apart.
There are parts of me that I used to be frustrated with – how I could never stay still in a job or part of the world for too long before I heard the call to move, the future-focused nature of my mind, the size and curves of my body – but I’ve learnt over this year that I am who I am. I’ve learnt to slightly accept more of myself and, on waking this morning and doing a loving kindness meditation, I chose not to send kindness to anyone else first of all (sorry world!) but to send it to myself.
I feel that I’ve moved greatly along the spectrum this year from sitting in self-hate to being a bit closer to living in a state of acceptance and love for myself. No, I’m not the finished article (nor will I ever be!) but I feel more gentleness, more love, more acceptance for myself and that makes me so happy.
I could say so much more on this special day of celebration for being here on this earth, alive and well, but I will stop here.
In short, this year has been amazing and I can’t wait to see where next year will take me.