Since I’ve started my maternity leave and welcomed little Jenson into the world, I’ve found myself on my phone more than usual.
I suppose it’s my link to the outside world when I’m anchored to the sofa mid-feed. It’s my way of capturing the special moments (in photo or in writing blog posts) of the first weeks of being a parent. It’s also my main source of support – connecting me with friends, family and my NCT group who I’ve gone to with numerous ‘has your baby done this strange thing!?’ questions.
And these are all good uses of the phone, helping me to keep sane and feel supported.
But I find myself compulsively reaching for my phone to fill moments of space. Moments which I would ideally like to spend taking in the wonder of my newborn son, connecting with my husband or just being fully present in the moment; not scrolling through Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter or Instagram mindlessly.
I know I need to disconnect more.
It’s not like I’m unsure how to do this…I’ve taken steps in the past to not be drawn into my phone – disabling notifications and deleting apps from my phone. But they don’t seem to be working as I try to rebalance myself in this new reality of motherhood.
Don’t get me wrong, I love social media. Without it I wouldn’t connect with you, dear friend and these first few weeks of parenthood would be a much lonelier place. I just know at the moment that my balance is off. And I know I can do something about it.
Do something so I can be present for Jenson – not have him grow up in the glow of my smartphone. And do something so I can be present for myself – alive to all that is going on around me.
So this post is to prompt me to disconnect; to be accountable to you, dear friend. I’m going to delete some of my apps from my phone, turn it onto airplane mode before going to bed and make the effort to be in the moment when I find myself mindlessly reaching for my phone to fill space and time.
It makes me feel relief to just write this, like I’ve made the decision I need to make and that it’s now just a case of following through with it.
And if you feel like you could benefit from a bit of a digital detox, why don’t you join me in taking a few small steps to find more freedom from your phone and more presence and space in your life?