blogging, motherhood, parenthood, self-discovery

Axis shifting

It’s been almost four weeks since my son came into this world and everything has been dominated by him pretty much. Blogs awkwardly typed in as he napped on my chest, conversations with half my brain focused on him, hours spent staring in amazement at what I created, endless conversations about what he’s been up to (“I think he’s making eye contact with me now” “he discovered his fingers today” “he sat by himself for a whole 30 minutes!”). 

I was writing a thank you card to a family friend for the kind present they had given Jenson last night and in it I wrote “parenthood is going well – it’s very different though and it feels like our whole universe has been shifted on it’s axis”.

I wasn’t really thinking that hard about the words that I was writing, but when I re-read the letter, I think that the axis shifting sums up these past four weeks. My life axis has shifted.

The same universe exists, with a small new planet orbiting around – planet Jenson – but instead of me being at the centre of the solar system, he is there. It doesn’t mean to say that any of the other planets, moons and suns stop spinning around (apart from those which may drop out of orbit for a while – ‘planet full night of sleep’ ‘planet full day spent lying on the sofa watching netflix when poorly or feeling very lazy’ 😉 ) or that they are any less important to me and my life.

But something has changed and I’m just starting to realise the magnitude of it.

My life has changed for good. My axis has shifted.

And sometimes I might need a moment to just acknowledge that. Especially on days like today when I am feeling a little under the weather. Or on days where I have slept less than usual. Or just on day that feel harder than usual.

Everything has changed for the immeasurable good and sometimes what seems like the impossibly difficult.

My axis has shifted.

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