I feel like I’ve been zapped back in time to six months ago when I left work to go on maternity leave. Standing here on the train platform waiting to travel to Worthing once more for work, I feel like nothing has changed…and yet so much has happened.
❤️ I’ve kept a human being alive and safe from harm for a whole six months.
❤️ I’ve changed immeasurably in terms of what I want from life and my determination to be boundaried with my life to get it.
❤️ I’ve had my patience stretched, my heart expand and no doubt my hair has become a shade more silver from the sleeplessness of early parenthood.And yet I’m still me. I still have the same love of my work. Still feel up for the challenges and opportunities daily life will bring my way. Still have ambition for what I can achieve and the impact I can make in my organisation. As I’m sat here (now on the train), I question whether these two ‘Amys’ can exist peacefully side-by-side. The fierce mother bear and the passionate worker. And here’s what springs to mind for me when I ask that question -Many women have done this before and so there’s no reason why I can’t too.I have a fantastic husband who is taking his first steps as main carer for our son so I have the right support to make this work. My first weeks are going to be full of trial and error. Leaving work at a sensible time to get home to my boys when I could stay later. Switching off my personal phone so I can focus on the task at hand at work. Being realistic about what I can achieve in the time I have. Being ok if I have to come home late every once-in-a-while.The thing that these two Amys have in common is passion. Passion for family and passion for work. So they’re not different people, they just have a different focus. So there you are, I’ve not got many answers but I’m ok with that. I’ll take it as it comes. Whatever happens, I’m going back to work and I’m going to trust that all will be well.