I wish I’d been kinder to myself

I was in a conversation with some mum friends recently, talking about recovering from pregnancy. Some shared that they’d put on weight since their child came on the scene. Due to the pressure and strain of little sleep, struggling with parenthood or just not having enough time to exercise or take care of themselves as they would have in the past.

I understood them, struggling myself at points with not having the time, energy or drive to get back to where I was physically before being a mum.

I fit in my old clothes but my body is different than it was before having Jenson and my diet is less healthy than it was before he came on the scene.

I reach for cake more than I did before and my exercise consists of rushing¬†around from thing to thing and running for the train. I don’t go for runs, I don’t stretch in yoga class, I don’t go anywhere to physically sweat and work out.

But I’m actually ok with that.

As I shared with these mama friends of mine, when I’m on my death bed, I won’t wish I had lost weight or toned up.

I’ll wish I had been kinder to myself.

I’ll wish that I had taken a step back and said ‘you’re doing a great job; working full time, being quite a badass new mum, running a coaching business, keeping friendships going, working on yourself.

I want to be kinder to myself and this means not pushing myself to be at my physical prime at this moment in time. Heck, probably accepting that I’ll never be at a ‘physical prime’ and knowing this is ok!

This kindness means not giving myself a hard time. It also means keeping an eye on my diet and making sure I don’t slip back into comfort eating to soothe myself from the hardships of life. It means accepting myself and not forcing myself to do any sports because I think I ‘should’ do them. It means eating a variety of fruit and vegetables to get adequate vitamins. It means keeping on going to bed at 8:30pm if I need to so I get enough sleep. It means continuing to give myself time along at the weekends to process and reflect on important things like kindness.

And as I think about kindness, I realise what a different place I am in. The old me of a few years ago would not have been able to practice such self-compassion and understanding.

I feel so grateful for where I am and how far I’ve come.

Life is wonderful.

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